August 28, 2010

There have been some fairly substantial and significant changes in my life of late. Firstly, I now wear glasses so you can update that random mental image you must have of me. I used to wear glasses about 3 years ago but I managed to leave them in the pub (I’ve left a lot of things in the pub over the years including but not limited to a coat, my wallet and my decorum on at leaST one occasion) and never got round to replacing them. I know I should have done something about it much sooner but at least it’s finally sorted and I can now see things without a blurry haze round the outside. Plus they’re purple which rocks.

Secondly, I seem to have accidentally acquired a boyfriend. It genuinely wasn’t my intention to do so. I’d pretty much decided to stay single until I was a lot more stable as past experience shows my mentalness and relationships really don’t mix. I was even determined for the first couple of weeks he asked me out. I said no, I told horror stories, I did everything in my power to dissuade him but for some reason he was still keen. In fact, he was so lovely to me that eventually it seemed churlish to keep refusing and I thought I’d give it a chance. It’s still very early days but for now it’s making me incredibly happy and has given me back something I thought I’d never have again. I’d forgotten just how much fun the early days of relationships are *blushes*.

And finally… I’m getting degus 🙂  Yay! Small furry creatures to make my life complete. But this is going to have to be our little secret as I’m not telling the landlord about them. What he doesn’t know can’t hurt him, right?

Anywho, I’m off to the supermarket to get stuff to make dinner for boyfriend and I tomorrow. *skips off, whistling contentedly*


Side effects

August 16, 2010

I wrote a while back about risperidone and weight gain as the price I seem to be paying for some stability. Thinking about it though, that’s not the worst problem. I could probably shift the weight if I just got my arse into gear but I can’t bring back what’s gone. I’m talking of course about my memory, vast swathes of which seem to have disappeared. I’ve always had a good memory. When I was a small child, I was always the really annoying one who memorised the whole school play and then attempted to prompt from on-stage causing chaos all round. Through GCSE and A-level exams, I was lucky enough to remember things just by reading them a couple of times and even on into the start of my degree I had a word perfect recall of obscure but relevant facts and figures.

It’s that degree (amongst other things) that has gone. I worked hard for three years to get my degree despite being quite unwell for the last two of them. I learnt a lot, I could apply that knowledge. I could identify minerals, discuss the origin of the landscape and tell you what rock went where. It was a geology degree you see. And now I’m left with nothing. I can’t even remember the fundamental basics. My knowledge of geology is reduced to that of a school child and I miss it.

It seems a high price to pay that to be well I have to lose so much of what got me to where I am today. Sometimes life just really isn’t fair.


August 11, 2010

I’m back! I’m safely ensconced in my new flat and have (finally) got the internet working. It’s been a manic few weeks what with moving and then me going down to London to do a weeks voluntary work. But I am back now bar holidays and I promise to bring you more whining rubbish and hopefully some posts of a more irrelevant, upbeat nature sometime soon.