I am a 22 23 24 year old graduate of University. I went to Cambridge, apparently this makes me intelligent although my day to day behaviour provides strong evidence to the contrary. I tried to be a geologist but mental health problems interfered in making me a good one so I decided to retrain as a nurse (as you do). Unfortunately, my mind once again got the better of me and I dropped out of my second degree in January 2010. This means I’m currently taking a medically recommended break to sort things out before I manage to mess up anything else (aka benefit scrounging scum)

I suffer from depression social phobia and agrophobia chronic PTSD borderline personality disorder (why yes, I do collect diagnoses!) which is medicated into sometimes submission.  I attempt to keep myself vaguely anonymous although effort in this varies based on mood/day of the week/what I’ve eaten for dinner.

This is mostly entirely a fairly dull blog about my life, my problems and a system that really tries it’s utmost to destroy me.

Occasionally I password posts. This is either because I’m ashamed of what I’m writing or because they make things a little too identifiable and I wish to respect the privacy of others. If you want the password, feel free to ask 🙂


5 Responses to About

  1. willspirit says:

    Hi Ana

    I just checked back to look at (more of) the comments on your last post. You’ll recall that in my little blurb I directed you to my blog, which at the time was talking about spiritual things. I’ve moved on now, but your post caught my attention when I read your conflict about ‘God’ (I don’t place quotes to imply G. doesn’t exist, but only that we are using the name G. for something which is probably far deeper, and both more complicated and more simple than we ever suspect.)

    Anyway, I’ve been looking around your site a bit more, and I’m troubling you again because I notice your diagnosis of BP disorder. That entity gives me pause. Historically, it was used pejoratively by (male) psychiatrists to stamp (usually) female patients with a label that communicated their frustration with what they perceived as manipulative and/or seductive and/or angry behavior.

    Marsha Linehan, as you probably know, has rehabilitated the diagnosis, so that clients/patients/consumers/users can now carry it without necessarily being prejudged as ‘maddening-and-impossible-to-help’ by clinicians. Still, I would be cautious about reading too much into the term unless you really trust the person(s) who gave it to you.

    Hopefully, you know a little (or a lot) about Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). I have found the parts of the training I’ve completed quite helpful (off and on I’ve carried the BP diagnosis, even though I’m a man–probably the ultimate insult by my psychiatrists).

    Frequently, those labeled with BP disorder were raised in traumatic environments, and often suffered sexual abuse. Since you are at present living with your parents, I hope that means they are good people and have treated you well, so that your diagnosis (if accurate) arises from other causes. If for some reason you did get mistreated as a child, my heart goes out to you as someone who can really understand.

    Take care. I apologize if this comment has upset you or struck too deep. You are so young, and I am so suspicious of the mental health system, that I felt compelled to reach out with a little information to help you negotiate your issues. SInce you are obviously quite bright, I suspect you already know all this stuff, and perhaps have long since quit reading this comment. But I am unable to resist trying to help if I think I possibly can.

    Take Care.

  2. Hey, been reading your blog and found it really interesting. Could I add you to my blogroll?

    outwardly x

  3. Kelly says:

    Dear Anickdaler,

    As the media intern for a non-profit focusing on mental health advocacy, I recently came across your organization in my online search for mental health resources and believe there is an excellent opportunity for cross-promotion between our Web sites.

    Peers Envisioning and Engaging in Recovery Services, or PEERS, is a consumer-run agency that is leading the innovative Social Inclusion Campaign in Alameda County, California. The mission of the campaign is to promote social inclusion of and end stigma and discrimination against individuals with mental health issues.

    One way we hope to promote social inclusion is by asking members of the community to make a personal commitment to end mental health stigma. By taking the “Stigma Stops with Me” Facebook pledge on our website (http://www.peersnet.org/pledges/makepledge) or on our Facebook page (http://www.facebook.com/pages/PEERS-Peers-Envisioning-Engaging-in-Recovery-Services/82259569303), you will be bringing people together to combat mental health stigmatization and advocate for the betterment of the community as a whole. We also welcome any friends, family, or colleagues you have who may be interested to pledge as well.

    In addition, we are interested in placing your link and logo on the PEERS Web site as a “Community Partner” at http://www.peersnet.org/partners. In return, we would appreciate a PEERS logo and link placement on your site if you are able.

    Thank you, and I look forward to the opportunity of working together!

  4. occasionalwallflower says:

    I also collect diagnoses. It’s a hobby 😉

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